When I first attended a Ho’oponopono class at the age of 26, I was overwhelmed by constant anxiety and fear to the point that I no longer knew who I truly was.
I had no confidence, and no matter how hard I worked, it felt like none of it was leading anywhere.
Even though I took many notes during that first class, I didn’t fully understand the content. But that night, I had a dream. I don’t remember the details, but I was left with a strong feeling that “I am in the right place.” That feeling was incredibly refreshing and gave me a deep sense of peace I hadn’t felt in a long time.
Up until then, I had tried to solve everything through intellect alone. Even after I began practicing cleaning, I didn’t notice any dramatic changes. However, I quickly realized that this process is about simply “doing”—using the tools and continuing. It’s not about achieving specific goals or gaining something in return.
With each cleaning, I slowly began to open my heart to my Unihipili (subconscious), and as I built a relationship with it, I started to understand that the root of my problems lay within my inner memories. I came to truly see that my experiences were not caused by the outside world, my parents, or past traumas—it was all memory being replayed within me. Even though the anxiety didn’t disappear overnight, touching that realization brought me peace.
As my inner family became connected as one, I was able to rediscover my true self—my identity. Before I started cleaning, I had mistaken my experiences for reality itself, believing that they were who I was. But now, knowing that these are merely memories playing out is one of the greatest insights I’ve had, and it feels truly wonderful.
No matter how painful or frightening something feels, it is simply memory being replayed. That’s why, through Ho’oponopono, we are given the gift of dealing with it, letting it go, and allowing ourselves to be free. When the Unihipili shows us something, we can accept it without fear and clean with it. The awareness that I can love the act of cleaning itself, and face whatever arises with an open heart, reveals my innate ability to be where I am, doing what I’m meant to do in this very moment.
We often try to measure whether we’re happy or successful based on our emotions or external circumstances—our relationships, income, or what others say about us.
But in those moments, I encourage you to ask yourself, “What within me is creating this experience?” Let me repeat that: “What is it within me that is causing me to have this experience or see this situation?” Even in moments of deep sadness or shock, this inner inquiry is incredibly important.
At the same time, my role is not to find the answers or blame anyone else. It’s simply to notice the problem, ask inwardly, and practice cleaning. That’s all. It feels similar to cleaning a room without thinking—when you clean, dust naturally gets swept away. When you practice cleaning, change naturally occurs.
For me, the occurrence of a problem has come to feel like a form of support—a sign to begin cleaning. Of course, we don’t need to understand everything. There are times when we may not even want to know. But even then, something within is shifting, and that inner change becomes a powerful action that transforms reality and the world around us.
Peace begins with me.
Caroline Kawaianuenue Sayres
