Vol.14 Wanting to be understood
We all may carry a longing within us:
"I want to be understood," or "I want my true voice to be heard."
I have worked so hard. I have contributed so much. I have made so many sacrifices. I have this much kindness and compassion. I have these talents. And right now, I am suffering this much.
When misunderstandings arise while we are holding onto these feelings, we can unknowingly find ourselves trapped in an endless "battle of the intellect."
What became clear during this Strawberry Jam was a wondrous experience: that even in the midst of such a battle, by continuing "one thing," what we truly need returns to us.
Together with KR, we look at the memories behind the desire "I want to be understood" from the perspective of cleaning.
Vol.11 Starting Fresh from Within
When a new chapter of life begins, we often have a bright, bustling image of cherry blossoms in full bloom and a future overflowing with hope. Yet, if I look closely, I realize that a complex blend of many different feelings is stirring within.
Expectations of who I want to be, the determination to let go of the past and embrace the chance for rebirth, anxiety about the new people I will meet, and even a faint sense of resignation hidden somewhere.
As I cleaned with each of these feelings one by one, a refreshing realization suddenly surfaced—just like a tiny new sprout.
"Right now, I am being given the most wonderful gift!"
Vol.10 What Is a Friend, Really?
What is a "friend"?
What does it mean to me to feel that I have "no friends" or "only a few"?
Because it’s not exactly a vital necessity for surviving tomorrow, these thoughts about "friends" tend to just drift into my mind from time to time. However, as I cleaned with the honest feelings that surfaced, I began to see something that goes far beyond the framework of "friendship"—something more like my own way of being.
The friendships KR-san builds every day at her ranch served as a wonderful hint. Whether it’s a friend I’ll never meet again or someone I currently consider a "friend," if they appear in my heart right now, I want to continue cleaning with them using the tools KR-san shared with us.
Vol.8 Conversation in my head
Whether I am meeting someone or walking alone, the chatter in my head can start up so suddenly. When the content of that conversation is unpleasant, I tend to immediately judge myself harshly, or feel lonely and miserable. Then, I struggle as I pile even more thoughts on top of that initial conversation.
But! As KR shared with us, that is exactly where the "Golden Ticket" is waiting for us. It was such an encouraging session that reminded me: through cleaning, we are always in the perfect place, right now and in every moment.
Vol.7 Here and Now, I Am Experiencing
There were moments when I caught myself thinking, “Maybe I’m overthinking this…” and wondered what to do with that part of me. Should I judge it, try to stop it, or simply keep “cleaning”?
Through my conversations with KR-san, I found myself wanting to clean more and more—without forcing anything. Even when I started feeling bad or small for overthinking, I realized I could just clean that too.
In doing so, I naturally rediscovered a gentle rhythm that helps me move forward with ease.
Vol.6 The Weight of Regret
For me, "regret" has always been like a blindfold, obscuring the joy and beauty of the present moment. It’s not just a blindfold, but something heavy and painful—so powerful that, no matter how much I try to do good or make an effort, it suddenly appears and takes away all my confidence. Once I do something that leads to regret, it feels like a tattoo that never fades.
So, when I was eagerly looking forward to asking KR about this during today’s Strawberry Jam, as if clinging to a thread of hope, the cleaning tool provided turned out to be exactly what I needed!
When I tried it during the session, just as KR had described, memories began to surface one after another. I became so absorbed in the cleaning that I didn’t even have time to feel the weight or pain.
Vol.5 Why Is It So Hard to Get Started Even When I Really Want To?!
I’ve often told myself that I’m lazy, a person who gives up easily, always tired, and that it’s already too late. These were the words I repeatedly threw at myself whenever I couldn’t follow through with what I had decided to do.
When KR explained that the most important thing is returning to my true self, and that this is more important than doing what I want to do or blaming myself for not being able to do it, it made me realize the labels I had attached to myself. Every time I remembered these labels, I did a cleaning, and within just 1 hour and 15 minutes, I was able to feel lighter again.
